It's one thing to get lost on your way to nowhere land, knowing you'll eventually reach the destination, no matter how long it takes, be it half an hour, one hour or one and a half hour, and quite another to have a non-license-holder front-seat passenger sitting beside you, lecturing you on why you didn't check with the experts on the best route to take, sulking throughout the journey and threatening to call off the outing altogether and wanting to go home. Why can't the women understand that when it comes to map-reading, it's a matter of pride to the guys? You can say it's an "ego" thing. We men are supposed to be better at map-reading! (even though Victor has taunted that I'm an exception!)
I was on my way to The Chevron, a chalet at Jurong at the invitation of the Slim Lady's sister. It's also a celebration of sort for Senior Junior's birthday, which is tomorrow. Despite checking the route on the directory, I got lost after a right-turn from PIE into Toh Tuck Road. My sis-in-law had told me to look out for Toh Guan Road but as I drove on, I ended up at Bukit Batok. The Slim Lady started nagging me for not having the sense to check out the route earlier with her sister. Instead of helping me to look out for the chalet, she sat there, pulling a long face and yakking away. Ok, so I tend to get lost travelling in unfamiliar roads(which driver has not?). But it got worse each time the Slim Lady was at the front seat. In the end, when we finally arrived at the chalet, I was in no mood whatsoever to even relax!
That said, it's true that I'm quite muddle-headed with it comes to direction (ok, I swallowed my pride). But I have a valid reason for being so. Other than using the car to travel to work, home, my mum's and in-law's house, I don't use my car much cause we don't go out very often, not even on weekends. And those damn road directories! They just don't seem to portray the roads accurately! I suppose the only way to get myself familiar with Singapore's road is to change my job to become a taxi driver! Maybe that's a little drastic. Either that, I should spend my weekends travelling to all corners of Singapore, just to get myself familiar with the roads (never mind the petrol!) Better still, convince the Slim Lady to take up driving! Then I can just sit back, relax and yak at her to give her a taste of her medicine! Aarrgghh!!
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5 comments:
I have a few suggestions for you:
1 Put the no-license-driver in the back seat where she rightfully belongs and then you could address her correctly as the 'back-seat driver'. Better still, if your car's puny boot allows it, put her there. Then you will only hear muffled sounds instead of constant nagging.
2 Go to far-out places for breakfast on weekends, e.g. Ikea which I frequent quite often. The drive should be quite long (that is even without you losing the way, haha). Everytime you go there, take a different route so you get to know more roads but more importantly, more routes.
3 Offer to drive (your car) out for lunch with BAGUS team more often. With map-readers and topographers by your side, we guarantee that you will not lose your way but will instead learn in a leisurely way the route to a destination. More importantly, we DO NOT NAG whenever you make a wrong turn.
Becoming a taxi driver is definitely not the way to go, trust me. With your (lack of)knowledge of Singapore's topology, I am quite sure that you will be at the receiving end of countless brickbats hurled by nasty passengers (which could be comparatively far harsher and unforgiving than the rather innocuous nagging).
I knew this was coming, Victor, your scornful and "clever" retorts. I came close to hanging myself in our office toilet for the humiliation I suffered at your hands! But then decided that if I have to do so, I'd rather do it in YOUR cubicle. You nasty and spiteful man, you!
But guess what? There's a happy ending to my story that I didn't include in my post. That night, with the light low and the radio on, and knowing that my ego was bruised (by her no less!) the Slim Lady came to the room and delighted me with a peace-offering no man could ever refuse.... oohhh.. ahhh.. yesss... It's the kinda psychological game women like to play with their men. They hurt your ego, you gave them the cold shoulder, and they in turn give you the CFM look and expect us men to "forgive and forget". I seem to recall you telling me that not all wives are like that. Well, I think MOST wives are like that when you've been married for more than 16 years, ok?
Oh dear, will somebody from SOS help this guy out - he's suicidal. Not something I would expect from someone working in the advertising industry where one's supposed to exhibit the good side at all times and take the initiative to reach out constantly. So whip out your mobile and call them. Their number is 1800-2214444. Since you're are net savvy you may also register your need on their website at www.samaritans.org.sg.
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