Thursday, February 08, 2007

Once there was a girl, the prettiest in the line ...

The girl needs no introduction, of course.

She was (still is) a nurse. I was a soldier.

She was the sister of a friend. And I was a friend of her sister.

She had her suitors who drove big cars, and who wooed her with flowers and brought her to posh and fancy restaurants. I had nothing and nobody; but was looking for love (in all the wrong places, as Johnny Lee would have sung).

As Cupid would have it, she only had eyes for me.

She asked me out for a movie. "I've bought the tickets," she called one day. I remember the name of the movie and the cinema - "Stand By Me". We planned to meet at the now defunct Orchard Theatre.

When I reached the Cinema, she was already waiting for me, her hands full with a McDonald's paper bag, stuffed with fries and McChicken.

She said the bespectacled me was kinda cute and she loved my loving nature. I thought she was demure, sweet as sugar and I liked it that she seemed to have "no-temper". We fell in love. And got married. I thought our marriage was made in heaven. The honeymoon was so sweet; but how soon it flew!

Of course, after almost 18 years of being "enslaved" to each other, we know better then believing in marriages made in heaven. She actually has quite a temper, which had been lying dormant. She tricked me! But our married life is typical of most couples - we love, we bicker, we scream at each other, kiss and make up. Couples who said they do not squabble are either not telling the truth, or they're simply not communicating.

She's a lovely wife (she does not fancy diamond or credit cards), and a good mom (she knows how to handle the kids to make them seen, and not heard). But no matter how hot and steamy a relationship is, passion does, unfortunately, fade with time (no?). There are times she made me darned mad with her unreasonable behavior (aren't most women like that?). I reminded her that I AM THE HEAD OF THE HOUSE. She added, "Well, then I'm the neck that controls the head!" How does a man respond to that? I was left speechless.

But I love her, I really do. But there are times when I juz feel like, you know, strangling her, making her see things from my point of view.

Truth is, nothing quite prepared us for what lied ahead when we took the plunge. When we registered our marriage at the ROM, we weren't given any instruction manual like "An Idiot's Guide to being a Perfect Spouse" nor "Parenthood Made Easy". Weren't most married couples like us? We simply dived into this institution called marriage, haplessly and without much clues as to what it takes to make a good husband or a good wife.

But hey, all is not lost. Maybe what I need is juz a little guidance from the love gurus on how to treat and love your woman better. (Darned! The only person whom I thought is an expert on love is currently in a men-bashing mood). But I spotted a book at Times, the bookshop the other day, that might juz do the trick! "The Five Love Languages - how to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate. Men’s Edition" by Gary Chapman seems juz like what I need to fix my wife make me more aware of what my wife really needs...



I flipped through the book. It does look promising with chapters like:

  • What Happens to Love After the Wedding?
  • Keeping the Love Tank Full
  • Love Language - Acts of Service

No, this entry is not a prelude to that V day much dreaded by us men. Lucky for me, the Slim Lady doesn't believe in Valentine's Day either. She used to say it's a total waste of money to buy flowers. My female friends told me that's crap. ALL women from age 2-92 luuurrrvve flowers.

Let's see what Mr Gary Chapman has to say about that .....

Category: Musings

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

A pefect couple, I would say. You don't give her flowers, so was she touched by this "花"言巧语 of yours dedicated to her for Valentine's day? Hahaha...
Me thinks it's total waste of $ to buy flowers too leh! (Handbags or any pretty bags are more practical lah!)
That makes me a 1-year-old or 93-year old :O
My hub. & I prefer a good dinner together.

Lam Chun See said...

The slim lady is lucky to get such a Romeo. Can cook, can wash and even can write poety.

Chris Sim said...

Tigerfish - I'm sure you whip out the good dinner yourself hor, judging by your tasty blog.... it looks so delicious I've to refrain myself from licking it! hahaha... And you've juz debunked the myth that all women like flowers (other than those 1 or 93 years old). But I'm still going to buy flower for my lady, anyway... hehehe...

Chun See - You're the 2nd person to say the slim lady is lucky to have me. Usually people say the other way round, that I'm lucky to have her. Why? Because having a nurse in a family is the next best thing to having a doctor. They come in handy if you fall ill at home lor. And they are very knowledgable when it comes to medicine... Hahaha....

eastcoastlife said...

What for waste money on that book? Read another 10 books also the women wouldn't change.

If you get a wife like me, lagi worse. Count yourself really lucky lor. You have the chance to complain, Chris Tan dun have any chance to complain, ok?

I'm no love expert la, only torture expert & love-making expert. Send your wife to me for these lessons la. muahahaha.....

Victor said...

Chris, you know people on a men-bashing mood and you still want to bang your dickhead against the wall. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Women not like men, maybe people got that time of the month leh, muahahaha.

Chris Sim said...

Jayne, u very jialat one. Dun tell me you're really the "neck" ah? Chris (Tan not Sim), the head must do all your bidding ah? One day, he turns 360 degree then u dun cry ahh.

Victor, why u so worry? Some women may not have already.... and they get cranky and go on a men-bashing rampage because of hormonal change lor. Better stay clear ahh. Wahahahahah...

Chris Sim said...

And Jayne, what makes u think I bought the book? Cannot steal meh. Wahahaha....

And who said anything about changing women? The book is meant for men to understand the love language of their women. The aim is to make the men change their behaviour towards women, and not for the women to change. Aiyah... I lend u read lah. Chris (Tan not Sim) would be so pleased....