Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Reasons why i dun wan to fren you oredi


  • You kiss and tell, and talk too much.
  • You always suck up to the boss; and you've elevated the act of apple-polishing to an art.
  • You're so loud, your voice can rival that of BBC. Juz that the latter talks more sense.
  • You always portray yourself as the victim, the damsel in distress.
  • Sometimes we do lunch, and sometimes we don't. But there's no reason why you can't say "hi".
  • You got iron teeth, and your skull's thick as the elephant's trunk.
  • You're only interested in talking; never really bother to listen.
  • You owe me money. Lots of money!
  • You always picked the good cherries, and gave me the rotten ones.
  • You're too clever for your own good. I hate your guts!
  • You bitch too much. Admit it; say you're bitch.

Sure, it's always nice to have a friend than a foe. But if you insist in behaving the way you do, then I dun wan to fren you leow!

26 comments:

Alexander said...

Is this directed at Victor?

Shilpa. said...

can't be me, hor? I so nice wan! some more i not o$p$ kind, haha

Victor said...

Alexander (you're not Alex G, are you?) -

It can't be me 'cos:

1. I tell and talk too much but I don't kiss, at least not Chris;

2. I am way pass the age for promotion so there's no point in my sucking up to the boss;

3. I may be loud but I talk sense;

4. I am not a damsel;

5. Chris and I don't "sometimes lunch, we "always lunch". However, I admit that sometimes I say "hey" instead of "hi";

6. Iron teeth and thick skull?Chris is describing himself, no?

7. Chris is quite a talker himself. Sometimes I have no choice but am forced to listen;

8. I neber owe him any money hor;

9. Where got cherries in the office? Even rotten ones also don't have;

10. I clever is not my fault mah;

11. MCP I may be but I ain't no bitch, okay?

12. If it is really me, I wouldn't be writing this but will be boycotting his blog.

Chris, what "fren, don't fren"? Can you stop being so childish? Grow up will ya?

And Alexander, don't be so sensitive for me, can or not?

Hahaha.

Shilpa. said...

Eh Victor, I laugh like hell reading your reply because suddenly it reminds me of that old group called the Kopi Kat Klan (or something liddat) who used to have a song called "Eh, Why You So Like That?". I vividly remember one stanza going "I always give you Kit Kat, I give you me Tic Tac, but now you got a Kit Kat, you neber gimme back", haha! :)

FireHorse said...

Ahhh one of those "syok sendiri" high maintanence individuals izzit? Mentally very exhausting being around them hor?

Victor said...

Shilpa - Thanks for that jolt of my memory and I'm glad that I made you laugh. (But I'm sure if I tell the same jokes continuously for 5 years, you will feel differently. Haha.)

Yes, I remember that song (proof yet again that I'm not that old). You can refer to its lyrics here.

There is another amusing rambling about Tic Tac and Kit Kat here. Someone who can't tell a Tic from a Tac consulted an Aunt-Agony-type Sharlene and this was her reply:

A Tic is a Tac and a Tac is a Tic. Just throw 'em all in your mouth and have a party!
However, there was still something bothering me about the whole Tic Tac thing. I disguised myself and went to several different stores to watch people buying Tic Tacs. What I discovered was amazing. More than 80 percent of the people buying Tic Tacs also bought a Kit Kat bar. And, those that first selected a Kit Kat bar, then picked up a box of Tic Tacs.

After pondering these purchase decisions, it came to me. If you spell Tic Tac backwards, you get Cit Cat. People were subconciously buying a Kit Kat then a Tic Tac and a Tic Tac then a Kit Kat.


Don't know how true hor?

And Chris, the message is in the song - Why you so like dat ah?

Haha.

Chris said...

Aduh! No one in particular lah.... It's really inspired by something I read .... These are some of the "generic" reasons why we cannot tahan certain individuals we meet in our daily life lor, especially in the office. I'm sure you've met some of them... Isn't life a challenge? ROTFLVVL.

But there's one individual who got on my nerve yesterday. I dun wan to fren dat fella already.. He went tea break and neber called me. Fine! But this morning, he bought "cai tao kueh" for me. $1 only also collected money. What? Not even a friendship price at 50 cents? Lagi dun wan to fren him! LOL.

eastcoastlife said...

Wah! You so havoc nowadays huh! For a moment, I thought you having office affair! hehehe....

Watch your back. Nanti dunno how you die. hehehe....

Victor said...

Chris, I know this friend of yours. (He spoke to me today about what happened.) As such, allow me to say something.

If just because he didn't call you for tea break yesterday and you "don't want to friend him", then you are over reacting.

Earlier this week, you went on leave without telling him. (That was quite unusual of you as you always kept him informed in advance whenever you wouldn't be in the office.) He only found out about your absence when he called you, intending to ask if you wanted your favorite vegetarian beehoon for breakfast. If so, he had wanted to buy it for you. Boy, was he hurt.

Yet, he put that all behind him and repeated his kind act this morning by buying you chai tow kway. Though he was running a bit late, he queued 20 minutes for your breakfast, drove 20 km back to office in the rain, purposely made a stop at the 4th floor (where your office is), just to personally handover your breakfast. It was still steaming hot when he handed it over.

That silly man - he was so kind that he even offered to buy a packet for your work partner. Taking full advantage of his kindness, your working partner even ordered an extra packet for his girlfriend, with a special request some more - "no chilli please".

So your friend ended up buying seven packets of chai tow kway. He had to endure the cold stares and the silent curses of those standing impatiently in the long queue behind him.

Now to repay his kindness, you are griping that he collected $1 from you? My, Why you so like dat ah?

He will definitely be very disappointed and disillusioned to know this. People seems to be taking his kindness for granted. As such, don't be surprised that the chai tow kuay you had this morning could very well your last from him. Even if you are willing to pay $10 for a packet, I am not sure if he will ever buy it again for you.

But I know this friend of yours very well. He won't take revenge or stab you in the back one. So you don't have to worry, okay?

Alex G said...

Oh no, look what you've done, Chris!

Vic: Alex is short for Alexander, isn't it? I was using a different computer that day.

FireHorse said...

Hi Chris if you got time hop over I got surprise for you!!

Victor said...

Alex G - So the Alexander who gave the first comment above was indeed you.

What "using different computer"? Blue clickable link means you have a blogger account, okay? Open your blog to us or we will ban you from our blogs. LOL.

Alex G said...

Didn't know I have a blogger account. Let me check it out.

So who was the poor kind man in Chris' blog?

etel said...

So funny! WAHAHAHAHAHAAH looking at GD replies to your blog. It was already funny enough, and its even funnier with GD's reply!

So cute lah, both of you.

and hor, why on leave also must report one, then go toilet need to report or not huh =x

Victor said...

Alex G - Acting blur izit? How can let you know who was the poor kind man? You so clever, can figure it out yourself wat.

Etel - Go toilet no need to tell. But if sh*t can't come out, then must tell. Wahahaha.

Long time didn't see you blog liao hor. Really give up ah?

FireHorse said...

Came over to answer your award question. Basically you award those you truly deem deserves it so you are allowed to give the award to people who already have the award. If you think only one person truly deserves the award then just give one award doesn't matter if that person already has one.
You see I dun have a "Sexiest Male Blogger" or "Hottest Male Blogger" Award mah so I give you and Victor "Thinking Award" lor Kekekekeke.

Chris said...

Victor:
Dun take it personally lah. You're not that silly (and kind) man wat. Why made so much noise? I'll tell you what I think lah... Maybe it depends on the level of friendship; but if that friend whom I buy the carrot cake for is a dear friend of mine, I would treat him. Really, honest! But of course, the story would be different if you were asked to buy breakfast for him, even if he's your dear friend, everyday, in which case, the friend, unless his skull is as think as the elephant's trunk, would also be paiseh not to pay up. If he doesn't, den he's out to take advantage of you.

But I can understand why the silly old man did the thing he did. If he dun collect the $1 from the friend, then he would also feel that he shouldn't collect the $1 from the others whom he also bought the carrot cake for. If not, he thinks he would be in a spot if the other came to know that I'm given the carrot cake free? But what are good friends for, anyway? Where should the line be drawn? $!? If he's hurt, I'm also hurt that I'm asked to pay up!

Do you think this is a case of good friends taking each other for granted? I think not. Or maybe I'm expecting too much out of a dear friend...

Chris said...

Etel:
This post is NOT suppose to be funny hor. What? Haven't you met those bastards before in the office?

And "cute" is not exactly the correct adjective to use on your GD. For goodness sake he's 51! Tsk!

Chris said...

FH:
Thanks for the clarification.... Victor very "lau geng" (Hokkien for skiving) one in the office. So "Thinking Award" fit him to a T. Heheh.

As for me ... it's time to really ponder ..... sigh...

Chris said...

Shilpa and Victor:
Both of you what kit kat and kit kit kok kok? LOL.

Chris said...

Alex:
Ya, let us access your blog. Why so scared? What are you hiding from us? R-rated one arh? I'm not underaged, but I'm not quite sure about the bloke who is 51 going on 15. Or you bitched about us in your blog izzit? Dun worry, we are very forgiving people. I won't do anything to you so long as you stop bitching about me. But I wil do something to you if you STOP bitching about Victor. LOL

Chris said...

ECL:
Office is to work wan, not to 偷吃 wan. That one must find outside wan. Heheh.

I already kena backstabbed until my armour suit pecah lobang oredi. Used to it leow lah.

Victor said...

I just think it's silly to make an issue over $1 lor. It's missing the wood for the trees.

And Etel's "cute" was used to describe both of us. Shameless of you to reject it on my behalf while silently accepting it yourself.

How can you accuse me of "skiving in office" without any evidence? Passing such malicious comments in a public blog is unbecoming of a good friend. My boss reads my blog (which is linked to yours), you know? If ever I don't get my PB next year or get anything less, you are to blame hor.

Chris said...

Victor:
Who asked you always advertise your blog so shamelessly? Dun forget you're faceless, and the only Victor we know in the office is VT. Scared den delink me lor. Hng!

Victor said...

Chris, I am not scared and I could easily delink you. I just feel that your comments and attacks are getting too personal for my comfort, especially when they appear publicly. As my good friend, I thought I should let you know. Joking about the wrong choice of a word and casting aspersions on a person's character and integrity are quite different things, I am sure you know.

I may be generally faceless in blogosphere but I use a real surname which is rare. Colleagues who visit both our blogs can easily identify who I am, especially when they can see your photograph so clearly. So I am not really faceless.

Victor said...

Chris, may I suggest that we take this discussion off-line?